5 Steps to Getting Over a
Relationship Breakup or Divorce

By Susie and Otto Collins, Relationship Coaches

 

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Getting over a relationship breakup ordivorce can be and usually is a major time of transition in a person's life.  No matter what age the person is when it happens, a breakup or divorce turns their whole worldupside-down. If this has happened to you, whether recently or many years ago, you may not realize that your future success in relationships is directly related to how much you learn from that breakup and how you move forward in your life.


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As Relationship Coaches, we've identified five steps to getting over a broken heart and moving forward with your life after a breakup or divorce. We've found that these are places in your life that you must deal with in order toheal, let go and move on tocreating more love in your life.

If you are ready, here are the five steps:

1: Allow yourself the space and time to grieve the relationship without wallowing in your grief. When there has been arelationship breakup,it’s often tempting to wallow in your pain—to play music thatreminds you ofyour old partner, to visit places where you went together as a couple,and toconstantly think about that other person. If you find yourself doing this and it is causing you pain, stop doing
it. Take time to cry everyday if you need to but don't keep yourself stuck in it by focusing on what was.

2: Begin learning how to build relationship trust.  When there has been a breakup and
you have beenhurt, it’s often difficult to open your heart one more time. Take the time tobegin learning to trust again and that begins with learning to trust yourself first. It doesn't mean rushing into dating again but it does mean learning to trust yourself and your ability to discern what it is that you want. Take some time and decide what you
do want.

3:If you had jealousy issues in therelationship that broke up, you need to overcomejealousy before you get in a new relationship. You may have been in aseries of past relationships
where your partner cheated on you. You may have low self-esteem issues. You may have had a habit of flirting withpeople other than your partner to get your partner’s
attention. Whatever the reason,jealousy eventually tends to destroy relationships and the time to heal it isnow as you examine what happened in your last relationship and
take responsibility for healing within yourself.

4: If there has been infidelity andyour partner was the one who was unfaithful, make sure that you take the timeto figure out how the relationship went wrong and what you might have donedifferently. In many cases, infidelityand affairswould never happen if
people understood how each person sabotages therelationship. Because people don’t
take the time to figure out what their partin the relationship breakup was, when they get into new relationships, thoserelationships often end in break ups and divorcealso.

5: In order to heal and move on from a relationshipbreakup, you have to begin envisioning what you want for a new romanticrelationship and how you want romance to show upin
your life. We’ve found that when you have a clear idea about exactly whatyou want in a new relationship, that type of relationship comes to you and yourperfect partner will show up. Manypeople feel that it isn’t possible to attract a soul mate to you but we knowthat
Not only do soul matesexist but you can attract the type of partner that you want.

There are many free relationshipadvice resources that deal with helping you get over breakups.
We suggest that you do some reading and thenbegin shaping your life the way you want it to be.

Check out our sites for more relationship help-- http://www.RelationshipGold.com  and our blog -- http://www.SusieandOtto.com

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